ASS
by CelcoLevi
Summary: When the boys start playing a game of Spore, an Alien constantly kills them and eventually destroys their entire planet, they will evolve from cell to space stage in order to defeat the douchebag controlling the ship. Feedback is highly appreciated. lots of content in this story is not in the actual game


It was a peaceful day in the world of Spore; Epics were roaring, tribes were gathering, creatures were laying, and a big fat Tromian egg had just flown out of the chef hut and popped open

"God damnit!" he shouted

"Dude, where the hell are you guys?" he said

"We're over here by the gathering canes" another voice said

The fat tromian had walked over to the gathering canes meeting up with three other Tromians

"Dude, we've been waiting forever!" the spearman said

"Well I'm sorry, I had to be reborn!" the fat one exclaimed

"If you didn't constantly attack other tribes, you wouldn't die all the time, fatass!" the farmer argued

"Aye! I don't need to take any of that lip from a farmer!" the fat one argued back

"Well Cartman, at the rate you're going, this _entire_ species is going to become extinct!" the farmer spouted, then angrily walked off

"Oh yeah? Oh yeah? Well your species is going to become extinct first Kyle!" Cartman yelled at him

The spearman put his hand to his face "We're the same species fatass!"

The horn suddenly sounded "Someone has sounded the alarm!" Cartman said

An alien spaceship appeared out of the sky

"Oh no!" the spearman muttered

"Dude, who the fuck is this?" the shaman mumbled

"He's this alien dude who kept blasting the shit out of me and Kyle with his laser when you and Cartman were asleep Kenny" spearman Stan answered

"It's okay you guys, aliens explore planets only to abduct" Cartman nervously reassured them

"No Cartman, this guy just wants to piss us off like a faggot with his Harley bike" spearman Stan corrected

The spaceship then shot a "mini" laser at Kenny, killing him instantly

"Oh my god, it killed Kenny!" spearman Stan spoke in fear

"You're damn straight he did!" Cartman replied

The spaceship shot Kyle, then shot spearman Stan. It aimed for Cartman

"No! I only just reached Adulthood!" Cartman screamed running away, the ship fired at him and killed him

The spaceship took a shot at the chieftain hut and damaged it massively, four eggs popped out of the hut and burst, watched in horror as the animals had been abducted by the aliens and had been taken away. The boys are shocked

"…Dude, he killed us all" Kyle said

"Yeah and he just ran away with our animals" Stan added

"We've got to do something about this!" Cartman suggested

At Cartman's house in South Park, a whole class of children are in a basement with Cartman at the Podium

"Alright, now as you all know, some giant butthole is constantly invading our planet, killing our tribe and stealing our animals for god knows why" Cartman announced

"Now what we wanna do is find out how we can stop this Bullcrap" Cartman added

Kevin put his hand up

"…Yes, Kevin?" Cartman nervously asked

"How do you know it's not because you're sick?" Kevin asked

"…Excuse me?" Cartman asked confused

"When an Alien wants to colonize a planet, they kill any infected creatures that may spread a deadly disease that can doom the entire eco-system and they may also abduct animals for another planet to colonize"

"…English, please…" Cartman requested

"If this guy wants to take over our planet, he has to kill a creature that has a disease that could eventually kill the whole planet and abduct animals for taking over another planet properly" Clyde responded

"…Right, except that is Bullcrap, because none of us were sick when we got zapped" Cartman explained

"Dude, can't we just drop this whole thing?" Stan asked

"What?" Cartman was infuriated

"Forget it dude, they're smarter than us!"

"Stan, you could either be mating with your girlfriend in game or slaying an epic, and in the middle of those things, you could get shot by an ASS" Cartman reminded

"ASS?" Stan questioned

"Yeah, Asshole Space Ship" Cartman explained to him

"Think about it dude, an ASS could just take out an epic with a one simple little missile, while we have to gather a whole tribe to kill one of them and a lot of fatalities get included!" Cartman said

Suddenly real time map of the world of spore went blank, Cartman was confused and looked at it, and it then showed a message saying: PLANET TRY HAS BEEN DESTROYED, CANNOT SHOW REAL TIME MAP OF WORLD, THANKS FOR PLAYING!

The everyone is shocked, especially Cartman, Cartman turns towards the crowd

"…Lame!" Cartman moaned

"Holy shit dude" Stan exclaimed further


End file.
